Small Reminders
by lvtwilight09
Summary: As a career Marine, Bella has been sent away on a long term deployment. How do she and Edward handle the separation and all that comes with it when her promise to return home to him becomes a promise she may not be able to keep?
1. Chapter 1

**FAGEtastic Four**

**Title: **Small Reminders

**Written for: **Mrs. Robward

**Written By: **lvtwilight09

**Rating: M**

**Prompt used: **Photo prompt: can be seen on my blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com

**Summary: **As a career Marine, Bella has been sent away on a long term deployment. How do she and Edward handle the separation and all that comes with it when her promise to return home to him becomes a promise she may not be able to keep?

**If you would like to see all the stories that are a part of this exchangevisit the facebook group: Fanficaholics Anon: Where Obsession NeverSleeps or add the C2 to get all thestories direct to your inbox. community/Fagetastic_Four/98339/**

**A/N: I've done my share of research for this story, and have done my best to make things relatively accurate, so please excuse any creative liberties I have taken with some things as just that…creative liberty for the sake of fiction. Also…I have a banner and good deal of pictures that go with this story, and will be posting them to my blog as the chapters post. To check them out, you can go here: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com **

**As for how this story will post, it is a drabble, and will post twice a day. All odd numbered chapters are Edward's POV, and all even chapters are Bella's POV, so each day you will get one chapter from each POV. **

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**EPOV**

You've been gone for so long.

Three years, four months, two weeks and two days…but who's counting.

It was only supposed to be a temporary separation.

But then everything changed, and you were gone indefinitely…leaving me with no idea of when or if you would ever return.

It keeps me awake at night…the not knowing.

Thinking of everything you've missed because you're gone.

You're always in my thoughts, every second of the day.

And when I see something that reminds me of you…of some memory of us, I can't help but wonder if the things that remind me of you, remind you of me.


	2. Chapter 2

**BPOV**

I never imagined leaving would be this hard.

It was only supposed to be temporary.

And now…it's been more than three years.

Leaving was the hardest thing I've ever had to do…but I had to…I didn't have a choice.

I've missed so much…birthdays, holidays…countless milestones.

There's no way to get those back.

I try to be strong, but the longer I'm gone, the harder it is…I'm so afraid of never making it back to you…to our daughter.

It's the unknown future that keeps me awake at night.

As crazy and as busy as things are here, I find you're always on my mind.

I find it's the smallest things which cause me to get lost in memories of us.

And when I see something that reminds me of you…of some memory of us, I can't help but wonder if the things that remind me of you, remind you of me.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com Chapter 4 will post this afternoon.**

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**EPOV**

Olivia turned four today.

You had so little time with her before you left…only a few months.

She loved the teddy bear you sent.

Was excited because it came from you, from a place far far away.

She's asking more and more when you are coming home.

I hate not being able to give her an answer.

I make sure to talk about you with her every night.

We look at pictures of us all together before you had to go away.

I know she doesn't remember that time…she was far too little.

And as for me…every time I see the pictures of us all as a family, I remember how happy we were, and pray that we can be that way again soon.


	4. Chapter 4

**BPOV**

I hate days like today.

Another birthday missed.

My baby turned four today and I wasn't there for it.

I'm her mother…I should have been there…not stuck half a world away.

I should have been able to buy her all sorts of presents, not just some teddy bear from the PX.

It isn't much I know, but I do hope she gets it…that way she knows her mommy loves her and misses her every day.

I wish I had more time with her after she was born.

But we knew the demands of my profession from the start.

Hopefully once this is all over I can get an administrative position, or one as an instructor, so I never have to be away from you both again.

I hate relying on pictures as a way to keep you close.

But every time I look at them, I savor the memories they bring up.

Do they do the same for you?

Do they remind you of how wonderful our life was?

I just hope we get the chance to have that again.


	5. Chapter 5

**EPOV**

We had dinner with your parents today.

I kind of lost my appetite when I saw we were having your favorite for dinner though.

I can't help but worry about you…are you eating enough…is there anything you need?

Charlie and Renee are doing well.

They miss you terribly though…just like Olivia and I do.

She loves looking around your old bedroom.

To be honest so do I.

I look at that room and remember so much…like when we were younger.

Like when I saw you for the first time.

You were at soccer practice.

It was fitting really that you were the team's captain…you're a born leader.

Olivia is just like you.

She's a spitfire, and already I can tell she's got a knack for kicking a ball around.

She loves being told how she's just like her momma…I just wish you were here to see just how much the two of you are alike.


	6. Chapter 6

**BPOV**

A few of the guys from my battalion asked me to play soccer with them today.

I did for a little while, but the memories are too much.

I still can't look at a soccer ball and not think of the day I met you.

I remember seeing you sitting in the stands watching me practice.

You kept staring, so I kicked the ball straight towards your head.

You were afraid to approach me for a week after that.

Do you remember that?

Does Olivia like soccer?

I wish I was there to be able to teach her how to play.

To see her laugh and giggle as she runs and to see her excited when she scores a goal.

There's word from some of the other officers…things are changing here.

We're supposed to be moving soon.

They won't talk about where though…it makes me nervous.

It's been so long and I've come too far for things to go wrong now.

My time's almost up here… I should be able to come back to you.

Just a few more months and then I won't have to rely on memories, or wonder if they have been enough to keep you holding on too.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**EPOV**

We got your letter today.

Olivia is always excited when her mommy sends her mail.

She's so smart already.

I wanted you to be a part of her learning to read, so as I've been teaching her, I use the letters you send us.

I've recorded a bit of her learning to read for you.

I sent it in the care package we sent you last week for your birthday.

I hope you'll be able to listen to it.

There's a new picture of her in there too.

She's holding the teddy bear you sent her.

She wanted to put it in the frame she made you, but I had to convince her that the frame could get broken in the mail, so she said she'll keep the frame for you until you come home.

God how I hope you're safe, that you come home soon…we both need you here with us.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**BPOV**

I got the package you sent me today.

I can't believe how big my baby has gotten.

And hearing her voice…hearing her learn to read…I couldn't help but break down a bit when I heard it.

I should be home for that.

I should be there with you helping her learn.

I've always been proud of my decision to defend our country, but no one ever explained just how great the cost would be…how much I would have to sacrifice.

I still remember the first birthday gift you got me.

I keep it with me still…even here.

We were at the carnival that came into town, and you won one of the games.

Your prize was this odd looking, purple stuffed animal thing.

But as soon as you got it, you turned to me and gave it to me as you told me "Happy Birthday."

I don't know why, but I thought it was the sweetest thing ever.

I got you a matching one a few months later for your birthday.

I can still remember how you laughed when you opened the package.

Do you still keep it on your nightstand next to our bed?

Do you still remember the story behind it?

Does it give you the same hope that maybe next year we'll be together for our birthdays the same way it does for me?


	9. Chapter 9

**EPOV**

Your last letter made me nervous.

You told me how your battalion is being relocated…that you're going to have to be out of contact.

You tried to make me feel better…told me that it's not for too long, that you're slated to be on a transport home in time for Christmas two months from now.

I'm afraid to tell Olivia.

I don't want to get her hopes up in case… well, in case anything happens.

I've been looking at our wedding album a lot lately.

I think it's because Alice and Jasper are finally starting to plan their wedding.

Do you remember him?

I think you only met him a few times before you were deployed.

He's good to your sister, makes her happy.

I think she's only starting to plan because she knows you're supposed to be coming home soon, and she wants you to be her maid of honor.

Your dad gave him the same speech he gave me about taking care of his daughter.

I can still remember how nervous I was when I asked him for your hand in marriage.

I can still remember how lucky I was the day you became Mrs. Cullen, and I realized I got to call you mine.

I just didn't realize that I'd have to go so long without you by my side.

Please be careful out there baby…I won't be able to handle not having you by my side forever.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**BPOV**

Last night's phone call with you was hard.

I loved getting to talk to you and Olivia, but knowing it'll be the last time I hear your voices for God knows how long is more than I can bear.

We leave tomorrow for our new location…well our first new location since we're going to be mobile for a while.

As I packed up my things, I couldn't help but remember when it was you and me packing up and getting ready to move.

We were lucky by military standards, after Officer Candidate School, I was stationed relatively close to where our parents lived. We opted though to just rent an apartment in case I had to relocate.

The apartment was small…just one bedroom, but it was ours and we loved it, and then when I got pregnant we decided it was time to buy our house.

We made love in every room when we finally moved in.

I still can't look at the island in the kitchen and not think of the things we did on it.

Does it remind you of that first night too?

Does that memory make you long for my touch, make you ache to be held in my arms the same way it makes me feel that longing and ache for you?

I'm scared I'll never get the chance to feel your touch again, never again get to feel you move within me as you show me how much you love me.

I already feel like I'm dying without it…without you.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**EPOV**

Three weeks.

It's been three weeks and we haven't gotten a call or a letter from you.

It's hard not hearing from you…not knowing that you're okay.

Olivia gets so excited every day when the mailman comes, and then when she doesn't see anything from you…my heart breaks as the disappointment takes over her face.

She understands though that you had to go away for work, that it'll be hard for you to send us letters or call.

She just misses you.

We both do.

I remember the first time you were away from me…when you were away for some of your advanced training.

How hard that was for us when you couldn't always call or write.

When you came home we got matching lockets.

And after Olivia was born we had one made for her and added her picture to it.

We had them inscribed on the front.

_More than my own life _they say.

Olivia and I wear ours every day.

Do you still have yours with you?

Does it offer you the same comfort it offers me?

Does it remind you of how much we both love you…how much we both need you?

It reminds me…every day.

It always will…as if I would ever even need the reminder.

As if I could ever forget.


	12. Chapter 12

**BPOV**

I hate not being able to hear your voice.

I miss hearing Olivia tell me about her day.

I'm scared this time Baby.

This mission isn't like any I've ever been on before.

Everyone is tense.

Members of the battalion are getting hurt or killed almost every day.

It's as if I can hear the ticking of the clock counting down until my number is up.

I wish I had you with me.

You've always been my protector…always taken care of me.

Do you remember when I sprained my ankle back in college?

How long it took me to figure out how to use the crutches?

How you would carry me up and down the stairs or whenever my arms got tired?

You were right by my side the whole time, taking care of me…making sure I was okay.

We still have those stupid crutches in the garage.

Do they remind you of how strong I think you are?

Or of how much it means to me to know how well you take care of me and our daughter?

I hope they do.

I hope I get the chance again to tell you just how much you mean to me…how important you are.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**EPOV**

I'm watching the news channels all the time.

I don't know why I do it…every time something about the military gets mentioned, my heart drops into my stomach until I hear that the story isn't about you or your battalion.

I keep reading the email that you managed to get to us a few days ago.

I'm glad you're okay.

Olivia was happy to hear from you too.

Especially since Thanksgiving was so hard with you not being here.

We all said we all said the same thing…that we were thankful for you, and the fact that you are still safe and how we all hoped you would be home soon.

I haven't told anyone that you thing that you should still be home by Christmas.

I'm still too afraid to make a promise like that to Olivia or get anyone else's hopes up either.

Alice and I are going to take Olivia to see Santa this weekend.

Do you remember the year I proposed to you?

It was a week after Thanksgiving, and I made you go see Santa with me at the mall after taking you out to dinner.

You laughed as I sat on Santa's lap, but you stopped the minute I answered him when he asked what I wanted for Christmas.

"For Bella to say yes to marrying me," I said.

When you looked at me, I was on my knee, presenting a ring to you.

A ring that you left with me because you were too afraid to travel with it.

They took our picture with Santa…even though we were too wrapped up in each other to notice.

Do you still carry that picture with you?

Do thoughts of Santa and Christmas make you remember the day you said yes to being mine for eternity?

They do for me.

And I can only pray that our eternity together isn't cut short by a stray bullet or an unchecked land mine.


	14. Chapter 14

**BPOV**

I can't help but hold hope in a vice grip.

Just a few short weeks until I'm on a transport back to you and Olivia.

I was so relieved to be able to get the email to you both.

I'm just as excited now that I have some time to try and call you.

I still remember the first time I ever made a call to the both of you…the first time I got to hear Olivia's voice.

That first time hearing her call me Mama made my heart swell with joy.

I look forward to actually getting to hear her say it to me in person.

I get so easily lost in my thoughts whenever I remember the little things about us…it's always the smallest of things that trigger the memories.

The ringing on the other end of the phone snaps me out of my thoughts.

I hold my breath as I hear the phone ring, static crackling in the background…these shitty satellite phones don't always have the best service.

I finally breathe as you answer.

I talk to Olivia first, and then you.

It's hard to hear…our connection isn't that great, but just hearing your voice, no matter what is being said is more of a comfort than you'll ever know.

The line suddenly goes dead, and at first I figure it's just because the signal was lost.

But then everything changes.

And my fear of never making it home swoops down, swallowing me whole as the camp air raid sirens go off.

I run to my assigned station, everyone's yelling and screaming echoing in my ears.

But the yelling and screaming is quickly drowned out by first sounds of the gun fire, and then an explosion.

I feel the wind get knocked out of me as I'm blown backwards by the force of the blast.

And then…I don't really know what happens then because everything just fades to black.


	15. Chapter 15

**EPOV**

It was so good to hear your voice yesterday.

Olivia's face lit up like a Christmas tree when she got to talk to you.

She needs you home so badly baby.

I do too.

Alice and I took her to see Santa today…the only thing she told him she wants for Christmas is for her mommy to come home.

The truth is it's the only thing I want too.

Our phone call ended much too quickly for my taste, but I know how unreliable those satellite phones can be.

At least I got to hear you say I love you, and I got to say the same to you.

The rest of the afternoon I can't help but get lost in memories of you.

Everything calls up some memory of the two of us…even the smallest of things.

Especially now that I know we're so close to getting you back to us.

I still keep the news channels on though…just in case…it's a habit I can't seem to break.

It's the news that brings me out of my memories.

The anchor on CNN starts talking about a raid on a US military installation…and they mention your battalion.

Some of the footage they have from their journalist who was encamped with you and the other Marines makes my heart stop.

They rattle off numbers…survivors, and then a death toll, and finally the number for the missing in action.

I don't know whether or not I want them to start listing names, but in the end they don't, stating that they are waiting for confirmation from military officials that all family members have been notified.

In this short instant, my world has come to a screeching halt.

I don't know what to do or say.

All I can do is wait and pray.


	16. Chapter 16

**BPOV**

Everything is foggy as I wake up.

I try to move, but I can't, and that's when I feel the binds holding me in a kneeling position with my hands behind my back.

Everything comes rushing back to me.

The phone call with you…the broken connection on the line, and then the screaming and gun fire.

The fact that I'm restrained can only mean one thing…that the attack on our base wasn't just an aerial strike…there were ground forces involved and they've taken prisoners.

I can feel the panic surging within me.

My breathing starts to come quick, but I fight to keep myself in control.

Whatever is happening here, I need to stay calm.

I need to be able to think clearly.

Because if I can't…then I lose all hope of ever finding a way back to you.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**EPOV**

I feel like it's been a lifetime since I saw that news broadcast, but it's only been one day.

I got the call last night from the base that they were asking all the families to report to Camp Lejeune today for a briefing on the situation.

I suppose I should take comfort in that.

I know if you were among the dead they wouldn't ask me to go…they always come to you when someone dies.

I'm still afraid though.

I haven't told Olivia.

She doesn't need to know about this.

I'm nervous as I walk into the building…afraid of what I'm going to hear.

I still remember the last time I was at the base with you.

It was a much happier day.

It was the day you were promoted from Second Lieutenant to First Lieutenant.

I was so proud of you that day.

We celebrated that night…and as far as we can figure out based on the calendar, that was the night we conceived Olivia.

Are you safe baby?

Will we ever have the chance to expand our family like we always talked about?

I'm brought out of my thoughts when a man starts talking.

He introduces himself as Colonel Benjamin Cheney and he goes into an explanation about what happened to your battalion.

All the details are insignificant to me though…all I want to know is where you are now.

And that's when he says it…he tells all of us in the room…that we're the ones who have family members who are listed as missing in action.

It takes everything in me to stifle the sobs and screams threatening to escape me.

How am I supposed to handle this?

What am I supposed to tell our daughter?

Eventually we all head home, and I know I have to tell the rest of our family.

After making the phone call to ask them all to come over, and arranging for a sleep over for Olivia, I finally break down.

My body convulses as I wrap my arms around myself in an effort to keep from totally falling apart.

I stare at the floor because everything I look at…brings back a memory of you and those memories just hurt too much right now.

Please Bella…please find your way back home to me.


	18. Chapter 18

**BPOV**

Death is all around me…suffocating me…reminding me that soon it will come for me.

I've been able to piece together why they targeted us.

They figured out we were the intelligence battalion, and wanted to intercept anything we had gathered so far.

They're smart…they know the rankings for the Marines.

So far for me there have only been beatings…I'm pretty bruised, but nothing is broken.

They get angry because no matter how much they've hit me, I haven't given in to them yet.

They've targeted me because I'm a captain…they think I'd know more than the others they've questioned and killed when they don't get the answers they like.

I can still remember how proud you were when I told you I was being promoted to First Lieutenant.

My last promotion to Captain though…it happened in the field…a stroke of luck for me really, even though it came at a price.

The previous Captain assigned to us was killed when their truck hit a land mine.

I was the next officer with the most seniority, and three days later I received the official word of my new rank.

I hope I get the chance to celebrate with you again the way we did last time…when we conceived Olivia.

I hope I get the chance to give you more children.

I hope I can just survive this place.


	19. Chapter 19

**EPOV**

Today is one of the days I hate the Marine Corp.

It's one of the days that I hate the profession you've chosen, because of the situation it's put us in.

Telling our family that you've been listed as MIA was the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

We've all agreed that not saying anything to Olivia is the best way to handle it for now.

We've just told her that you're in a place where there are no telephones.

Your parents and mine are devastated baby.

You're father blames himself…because of all the times you said you wanted to be like him…because he was a Marine too.

I can still remember how proud he was of you the day you received your commission.

I hate seeing him like this…a strong man like him…it looks wrong to see him so broken, and it makes me think of just how broken I must look too, because I know I am, and the only thing that can put me back together is you.

I've always been proud to be the husband of a Marine, but today…I'd rather you be anything else if meant you'd be here safe with me.


	20. Chapter 20

**BPOV**

I think I might have sealed my fate today.

They were interrogating me again.

Told me they'd never let me see the light of day again.

The thought of never seeing you and Olivia again made me snap.

I fought back, and tried to escape…I barely made it out of the room before they caught me.

The hit me pretty hard…I can't really see out of my left eye from the swelling and I have to breathe through my mouth because I think my nose was broken.

I think I broke someone's wrist.

I won't ever stop fighting for you and our child.

Do you remember the time you fought for me?

The time we were out at the bar when that guy Demetri had me cornered?

You were the designated driver that night, and I had a few too many.

You could tell that even though I knew how I was too tipsy to be able to coordinate a punch or a kick.

You tackled him and broke his nose.

You promised me you'd always fight for me, always be there to protect me even though you knew I could protect myself.

Now it's my turn to promise you something baby…I promise I won't stop fighting.

I promise to keep trying to find my way back to you.


	21. Chapter 21

**EPOV**

Its Christmas today, and I couldn't care less about the damn holiday.

You were supposed to be here.

You were supposed to be watching Olivia open her gifts from Santa…you were supposed to _be___her gift from Santa.

But now I'm here completely alone in this house.

Olivia isn't even here with me…she's at my parents' house with the rest of the family.

Both of our parents came over this morning to open gifts…I'm glad they did.

Olivia was so sure she'd find you waiting for her under the Christmas tree.

When she saw that Santa didn't bring her what she asked for…she lost it.

She started crying and yelling…she begged us to talk to Santa and tell him that he could take all the other presents back if he would just bring her mommy home.

Seeing her break down like that…it pushed me over the edge.

My parents took Olivia and your mom to their house and your dad stayed with me.

I damn near destroyed the house as I let out everything I've kept bottled up inside me.

After helping me clean everything up, your dad went to meet up with everyone else after getting me to promise that I'd be there later.

All I can think about is our first Christmas together.

How we were so happy and laughed while we had a snowball fight in your parents backyard.

How we promised to always be together for Christmas.

We always managed to keep that promise too…even if it was via phone call or skype while you were away.

But this year…that promise has been broken, and it's torn our family apart.


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**BPOV**

It seems like today's the day they're making me pay for my escape attempt.

A few of the people from my battalion that I'm being kept with told me to stay strong as they dragged me into the interrogation room.

The only thing that kept me strong was you and Olivia.

But the truth is though, between the cold water they keep dumping on me and the way they've _interrogated_ me today…I don't know how much longer I'll be able to hold out.

I can't feel anything in my left arm except for pain because my shoulder's been dislocated.

They kept working my arm over because they knew it would be a weak point for me.

I think they're giving up on using physical pain with me.

They told me they'd have other ways of making me talk.

_Talk_…it's such a simple word and yet it's the key to putting an end to this whole situation.

I can remember Olivia's first words…not that I was there for them.

But you caught them on camera and emailed the video to me.

I remember laughing when I watched the video because you wouldn't tell me what her first real word was.

You told me you thought it would be funnier if I was surprised.

I certainly was as I watched her babbling and then look you square in the eye and say "Poop!"

I haven't gotten to talk to you or Olivia in so long…I miss hearing both of your voices and the comfort they would bring me.

Do you miss mine?

Do you know what's happened to me?

What have you told our baby girl?

Has the Corp said anything to you?

Are they even trying to find us and bring us home?


	23. Chapter 23

**EPOV**

It's been three months since you've gone MIA.

All the little things that remind me of you…I almost wish they didn't anymore.

I can't bear the memories playing on a loop in my head.

Reminders of all the good times we've had…reminders that we'll probably never get the chance to make new memories together.

More than once I've read through all of your old letters you've sent, you're old journal entries from when we were dating and early on in our marriage.

There are so many memories on those pages, all of them special and equally hard to remember right now.

I feel like my grip on reality…on my own sanity is slowly slipping away.

There are too many what ifs.

What if you're hurt.

What if you're dead.

What if, no matter what's happened to you, they never find you and bring you home.

I hear your voice in my head every time the what if's threaten to take me over.

Like the time you kept me calm when I was worried about passing my licensure exams for teaching.

I had so many what if's back then, but you were the strong one.

"Don't worry about the what ifs, Baby" you said. "What's done is done, we'll face the future and make the best of it together."

I wish I could be that strong for you right now…for Olivia.

I try to be…every day I try to be strong.

But in the end, it's always the same.

Something reminds me of you, I get lost in a memory, and then I'm left wondering what if…


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

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**BPOV**

It feels like time stands still here.

I lost track of the days a while back, although it's been sixteen days I think since Jacob and a few of the others managed to get away.

I'm glad Jacob made it out. He's a sergeant from my battalion and from what I could remember, he had great navigational skills. He's our best chance at getting rescued.

The guys I've been kept with and I started trying to work out a plan to get ourselves out of here…especially after their threat of having ways other than beating us to get us to talk.

They started withholding food and water, only feeding us once every few days.

They gave us barely enough to keep us alive, enough to make sure we wouldn't die but would be weak enough to give them what they want.

The problem is…none of us know what they want, and the things they have questioned us about…we don't have the answers to.

We had one moment of opportunity and we took it.

Jacob managed to get himself and three others out of here before they found us.

Me and four others weren't so lucky.

They made us pay.

It hurts to breathe, so I can tell that my ribs, which are already starting to show from the lack of food, are broken.

They keep us tied up all the time now too.

I remember when I was still in ROTC and I was having a rough go of it because my drill instructor was pushing me hard.

"Don't give in to him," you told me. "They're only trying to break you. You're stronger than they think you are. Prove it to them."

I wish I was as strong as you thought I was baby.

But I'm not.

I'm so tired, and it hurts to keep fighting.

I'm sorry.

So very sorry that I won't make it back to you and Olivia.

I'm sorry I'm not strong enough to keep fighting.

I'm sorry that I've come to accept that I'm going to die here…and even more sorry that I won't ever get to tell you I love you one more time.

I try to close my eyes to sleep…it's the only time the pain of it all can't find me, but there is shouting and a loud bang and gunfire…

Something is definitely going on.

My heart wants to believe it's a rescue, that Jacob managed to get away and get help, but my mind knows better…it's probably just our captors putting us out of our misery because their tired of dealing with us.

I close my eyes again and picture you and Olivia in my mind, happy and smiling.

The door to my cell bangs open, and I tense, a whispered "I love you" passing my lips, as I accept my fate for what it is.


	25. Chapter 25

**EPOV**

BANG BANG BANG

BANG BANG BANG

"Edward! Open the goddamn door!"

The shouting startles me awake.

The ache in my neck tells me I fell asleep on the couch watching the news channels again.

Glancing at the clock I can see it's four in the morning and I'm confused about who'd be at my house this early.

BANG BANG BANG

I open the door with bleary eyes and find Emmett standing there.

My heart instantly drops into the pit of my stomach.

There is only one why he'd be here at this time of day.

Emmett, or Major McCarty as he's known in the Marines was assigned as the liaison for the families of the Marines listed as MIA in Bella's battalion.

We became close and developed a friendship once we realized his son Henry and Olivia went to the same preschool.

My mind starts racing…the only reason Emmett would be here would be because they've found you.

The only thing is…have they found you alive, or dead?

I can't help but think of the worst.

How am I supposed to tell Olivia that her mother is gone, is never coming home?

How am I supposed to pull myself together and move forward and be the father my daughter needs and deserves.

As hard as it's been, up until now, I've always firmly gripped to that small sliver of hope that you'd be coming home alive, and now…now I don't know if I can handle hearing the truth if the truth means you're coming home in a box.

I don't even realize that I've sunken to the floor and am sobbing until Emmett shakes me, pulling my attention back to him.

"Edward," he says. "It's gonna be okay man…they found her. They found Bella…she's alive."


	26. Chapter 26

**BPOV**

I wait to hear the sound of the gun…to feel the bullet rip through me…but it never happens.

Instead I feel the cool steel of a knife as it cuts through the ropes that bind me, all the while, a voice from the doorway tells me "It's okay Capt. Cullen, you're safe now. We're here to bring you home."

As soon as the ropes fall off me, I'm scooped into someone's arms, and carried out of my cell.

The light is harsh and hurts my eyes as we make our way out of the compound, but I can make out the dead bodies of my captors that litter the ground, along with the other prisoners being helped to the waiting trucks as well.

The fresh air is a welcome change for me after having breathed in the acrid stench that lingered in the cells we were kept in for so long.

Once inside the truck, I manage two words…"Edward…Olivia" before everything that's happened overwhelms me and I pass out.

When I come to, I'm in a hospital bed, my left arm in a sling, IVs attached to my right one, and I'm clean for what must be the first time in months.

Looking around the room there are three other beds in it, and in the one across from me is none other than Sergeant Black.

His leg is in a cast, and he's a little thin, but other than that, he looks pretty okay.

He offers me a smile once he sees I'm awake.

"Thank you," I croak out, my throat dry and sore.

"Don't thank me Cullen, you would have done the same for me," is all he offers as a response.

I don't know all the details of how they found us, and I don't quite care. All I know is that I'll be able to see you and Olivia again.

Later in the day, the doctor comes in to check on me, and goes over my treatment plan before he'll clear me to be sent back stateside.

It's funny though, how even in this moment, there are little things that remind me of you…of us.

Like the beeping of the monitors.

They remind me of when I was in the hospital when I gave birth to Olivia.

I couldn't stand the beeping of the monitors so you started trying to drum and hum a melody to go along with it, which only annoyed me all the more because despite how much you deny it…you are rhythmically challenged and can't carry a tune to save your life.

We ended up laughing over how we said that if we used it as a lullaby for Olivia, we could count on never getting her to sleep.

Do you remember that melody you hummed that day?

Does it make you laugh the way it makes me laugh?

Have you found yet that I'll be coming home soon?

Are you excited as I am about it, because I think I'm as excited now, knowing I'll get to go home to you, as I was the day our daughter was born.


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

* * *

**EPOV**

It's been five months since you went MIA, and two months since they found you.

I had hoped they would have sent you home right away, but the doctors wouldn't clear you right away, and the next scheduled transport for troops to be sent stateside wasn't until now anyway.

They said you had lost a lot of weight and were severely dehydrated.

They wanted to get you to gain some weight and allow you some time for your injuries to heal a bit before sending you home.

I was so scared the first time we spoke after your rescue.

We were using Skype and I could see how badly you had been treated.

I'm glad we talked when Olivia was at preschool…I didn't want her to see you like that.

We talked about a lot of things…your medical treatment, your plans for your future in the Marines, our plans for our future together.

Olivia was so happy to hear your voice again the first time you called her on the phone.

It reminded me of the first time you called her and she was really talking.

She was so excited to get to talk to you on the phone, that despite the fact that she could talk, half of what she said was babbled anyway.

Do you remember that baby?

Are you excited as I am that our conversations won't have to be through a phone or a computer anymore?

She's even more excited that you're coming home tomorrow…we even got her a special shirt to wear.

It's got pink on it of course, and says 'My Mommy Wears Combat Boots'.

She's so proud of you…we all are.


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: Pictures for this chapter are up on the blog: lvtwilight09fanfiction(dot)blogspot(dot)com**

* * *

**BPOV**

I've been waiting for this moment for so long.

I'm finally home.

Boarding the plane last night, I couldn't help but think about everything we've been through

These last two months seemed so long, even though they have been filled with rehab for my arm, talking with a counselor about my time being held captive, and preparing for going home.

It's been a big adjustment.

It's funny how differently the other Marines look at me now…with more respect.

Don't get me wrong, they've always respected me as an officer, but now that I've been given the label of 'prisoner of war'…it's as if they see me as a completely different person.

It's funny how POW, just three little letters can change everything.

And now…as we land on the tarmac, and march off the plane, I have to fight the urge to just run to you and Olivia…there is still protocol to follow, traditions and standards to observe.

My need to just run and seek you out grows as we fall into rank for the parade march into the cargo hangar.

The music of the Corp marching band is blaring as we enter to the cheers and clapping of the family members here waiting for us.

It reminds me of when we got married.

I was so ready to tie myself to you…for us to become a family.

Walking down that aisle…I couldn't get to you fast enough.

It was the happiest day of my life…up until we had Olivia…up until now that I've gotten to come home...back to you both.

We stand at attention as the Lieutenant Colonel welcomes us home and thanks us for our service.

I can hear the moment Olivia finds me, not that it's hard…I stick out like a sore thumb since my arm is still supposed to be in a sling for two more weeks.

I glance over to where I heard her voice, and I see you…looking handsome as ever with our beautiful little girl in your arms.

The speeches finish and we are dismissed and I allow myself to give in to the urge to run.

I run straight to you both, pulling you into my arms.

The emotions are too much to process as you both pepper my face with kisses all the while telling me "I love you…I missed you…Thank God you're home."

Everything in my world feels right again in this moment, because I have everything I need right in my arms…because I'm home.


	29. Chapter 29

**EPOV**

The moment you're in my arms I feel like I can finally breathe again.

I can't help but feel overjoyed as I finally see you here in front of me, with a smile on your face and our daughter in your arms after so long.

It reminds me of the day she was born.

You were in labor for so long with her, the doctors thought you might have to have a c-section.

And finally, things progressed and before we knew it, Olivia was born.

I'll never forget the moment the nurse first placed her in your arms…how happy you looked.

You look just as happy today.

I was so afraid of what being held captive would have done to you…that it would have broken you or killed your spirit.

But watching you march in here today, with your head held high and proud, and a confident look on your face, and I can see that it only made you an even stronger person.

There is so much I'm thankful for in this moment…

Our family.

The dedication of the Marines you found you.

For you and your determination to make sure you came back home.

But most of all…for all the small reminders…the memories of you and me that helped carry me through all of the difficult times.

And now…more than anything, as we walk into our home together, for the first time in almost four years…I'm thankful for you.


	30. Chapter 30

**BPOV**

It's been a year since I've come home.

So much has happened.

A lot has changed, but even more has stayed the same.

I was surprised at how understanding you were when I told you I didn't want to give up my career in the Marines…I was convinced that after everything, you'd want me to walk away from it all.

Olivia is happier than ever now that I'm home.

She's so smart and doing so well in school.

She's started begging us to give her a little brother or sister.

What she doesn't know is that we started working on that a few months ago.

We waited a bit until things settled down, and I started working in my new position as one of the instructors at Camp Lejeune.

We're telling everyone today…we decided to wait until we could find out if it's a boy or girl, and now we'll be able to tell Olivia that in a few months she'll be getting a baby brother.

Watching your face light up as we watched the ultrasound at the doctor's office made me remember so many things…

When we found out Olivia was a girl.

When I said yes to marrying you.

When I finally made it home last year.

And when I told you I was pregnant again.

All the little memories…the small reminders of this life we have together…the good and bad times we've been through…It was all those things that made the past few years bearable, and it's those small reminders that make the future so exciting.

Knowing that each and every day, there is something new for us to experience, something new that will become another reminder for us…of who we are, of where we've been…of how much we love each other, and how much our love will continue to grow each and every day.


End file.
